Category Archives: The Hobbit

by Quenya101 | 05/22/2013 · 11:22 PM

John Ronald Rootytoot Reagan … Tolkien (or something like that)

As we have already exposed all the known details about his great work the Silly Marillion, today we’re gonna read more about this peculiar author so renowned. Maybe you think you know one thing or two about him (or three or eleven or thirty-six hundred things) but get ready for the unbeknownst knowledge taken from Internet!

Who is Tolkien?

Famous director, author, dictator, actor, politician, biologist and hockey player(as well as frequent mentor to Batman’s younger cousin Manbat), J.R.R.R.A.B.C.D.E.F.X.Y.Z. (John Ronald Rootytoot Reagan Ass-Bitch Chix Don’t Even Frickin’ Xylophone Yurie Zauron) Tolkien is the historian who discovered that the true history of the earth was being covered up by the world’s governments, who did not want the general population to know of the existence of dragons, elves, hobbits, magic, etc, in order to maintain control over their people.

Tolkien’s greatest invention was the fantasy industry. Without his influence online collaborative games would all be about spies or snowboarding or something and goths would have to dress in pastel casuals. But thanks to Tolkien, gamers, goths, hippies, occultists and heavy metal bands have a rich reference-iconography of dark overlords, wizards, orcs, funny lettering, dungeons, bad fashion and awesome films to smoke dope to, allowing contact with the real world to be minimized.

Biography

Tolkien was born in 1066 to a hobbit awkwardly named Tolkien’s mom. He was given birth to in a chopshop amid the sprawling grasslands of central New Jersey. A prophecy told of his birth as the fruits of an Inuit and yet another hobbit. His legitimate mother found this odd as she was never married to an Inuit. The prophecy also said that within 5 hours of his birth he would successfully fight for hobbit rights among the population of New Jersey, and he did. A precocious child, he also learned to speak Welsh, Japanese, French, and Klingon within twenty minutes of his birth. He would go on to master the Inuit language, and is personally responsible for forty-seven of their eighty-two words describing snow.

Craving for more? Really? You got a strange taste, mate! It’s ok anyway. Sometimes, we all need to laugh a bit and not take things too seriously. So, the good, the bad and the ugly (jokes) you can find not here, nor here and neither here. It’s right…..there!

About these ads

The Church of Middle-Earth

It looks like, but this post is not about religion! Nor doctrines nor dogmas nor anything related to it. Actually, it’s a piece of artistic gallery about how a church (the building itself) would look like in Middle-Earth.

Middle Ages left us a rich story behind. Sure, there are the ugly parts where the Catholic Church killed them all; but artistically the Church was the main power and propeller of the beauties of that time. Sculptures, paintings, everything flourished and there’s a vast and unique collection attributed to this troubled times.

Even glass was used for art. The glass of everyday life, a substance for utilities, changed into art. Stained glass is art to the nth degree and why not decorating our fictional Middle-Earth Church with some of it, illustrating the “saints” of our time and their deeds of fame and glory? THAT is what this post is about!

Close your eyes, open your mind, see with your imagination. The story of our land through stained glass!

(Click in each one to open a large and detailed view!)

What a beautiful work! Unfortunately I stumbled upon this through Sociedad Tolkien Paraguay Facebook Page and that’s as far as I can go giving credits to those images. If someone knows more about them, please tell me!

EDIT: Gorgûl Morianna helped with the author info here! It’s Jian Guo http://breathing2004.deviantart.com/. Thank you!!!

Anyway, they are fantastic designs for stained glass and it’d be breathtaking to see some of them for real in the windows of some Church….of Middle-Earth!

18 Comments

Filed under Art, Dwarvish, Elvish, Fantasy, Inside Middle-Earth, Silmarillion, The Hobbit, The Lord Of The Rings

Tagged as artistic gallery, Catholic Church, J. R. R. Tolkien, Lord of the Rings, Middle-Earth, Stained glass

by Ondo Carniliono | 02/18/2013 · 9:17 PM

Tolkien magic…..gone?

It is known that I did not like The Hobbit (book), but that it almost ruined Tolkien’s magic for me, it is not much known.

In the middle of a discussion of the reason I do not like to celebrate, for example, Bilbo and Frodo’s birthday on September 22th, the idea to explain the reason it happened came out.

At first, my story with Tolkien. I started reading The Lord of the Rings, in Portuguese, when I was 8 or 9 years old. It took me almost two years to read it all, including the appendix. When I was 10 or 11 years old, I started playing with Angerthas Moria and I knew a bit of how the Shire’s calendar worked.

The deepness of the book, the fact that there was something behind this story, it always made me wonder. In some point right after this, I read The Hobbit in its illustrated version. I remember I liked it, but not so much, and started the Silmarillion right away, when I was… 12 years old(?) I read it whole and loved it.

The Tolkiendilli languages always intrigued me. I remember to write a lot on my notebook in Cirth and of being crazy to learn Sindarin (that I still don’t know and I’m not as curious as I was).

In some point, I read The Lord of the Rings for the second time and, when I was good enough to read books heavier than Harry Potter in English, I read it for the third time. Then, Unfinished Tales. I was about 16 years old when I started it and I decided it was time to learn Quenya. I met Erunno on twitter in some point and I started studying deeper this marvelous language. Right after that, I read The Children of Húrin and, until now, I can’t find a better book. A friend of mine gifted me The Silmarillion (the first time I read it, I borrowed it from my aunt) and I read it for the second time, knowing a bit of Quenya. There’s no such feeling as reading the Ainulindalë.

I always wanted to read the History of Middle-Earth series, but it took me too long to find them. When I finally did, I bought The Book of Lost Tales 1 and 2 right away. It took me a semester to read both and, needless to say, I got enchanted.

I stopped with Tolkien for a while, and after a year or more reading different things, I finally started The Hobbit, before the movie. All my Tolkiendilli friends commented so much, and bugged the hell out of me to read it!

And then…. where is it? Where’s the deepness? Where are the well-constructed characters with their marvelous and fantastic stories? What the hell are these elves? Beorn?!?!? I think I got so used to First Age and the War of the Ring that a very short and not so dense story such as The Hobbit disappointed me (yes, I know it was meant for children).

In the last chapters, I read the Annotated version. Then things got a little better, as it showed some details left by Tolkien, and also from where some things did come. But even then, I got disappointed. Some of the “Tolkien magic” ended, all the deepness and contextualization that always enchanted and impressed me, was gone. There’s almost nothing of it on the whole book, except for the Ring, the Gondolin swords and a little of the history of the dwarves, but even then it is not fully explained (something fixed in the movie!). And not to mention that the linguistic part of it is basically the runes on the map….

In the end, I missed almost everything that made me love Tolkien. Some of the magic of his work is lost. Maybe if I had read the Annotated version from the beginning it would have been different. But there’s still hope! The next book in line is Morgoth’s Ring. High, high, hiiiiiiiigh expectations. I hope I won’t get disappointed again!

Something Ondo will find out in Morgoth’s Ring…..(or not)

20 Comments

Filed under Hobbit, Quenya, Silmarillion, The Hobbit, The Lord Of The Rings, Tolkien

Tagged as Children of Húrin, history of middle earth, J. R. R. Tolkien, Lord of the Rings, Silmarillion

by Erutulco Eruntano | 12/21/2012 · 8:18 PM

The story of Númenor: another possible prequel?

When Peter Jackson makes a new movie, and we get out of the theater after watching it, most of us think “damn, I want more!”. The fact is he does a great job in taking Tolkien work to the big screen (for some more, for some less). And, looking it from the economical side, The Lord of the Rings is a very lucrative franchise.

So… what will come when The Hobbit ends? Our Master, Helge Fauskanger, has an answer, and I like it a lot! Some time after the movie trilogy ended (back in 2003), he published in Ardalambion a draft for another possible prequel: Westernesse or the story of Númenor.

Its an amazing story, which you may remember from the Akallabêth, the second to last part of The Silmarillion. It tells the tale of the civilization formed by the Men who fought Morgoth in the War of Wrath. For their help, the Valar gifted them with longer life, and an island as close to Valinor as men where allowed to be. Elros, who is Elrond’s brother (that choose mortal life), was the first King of Númenor. When Sauron messes with these men, the downfall begins, leading to them migrating to Middle-earth and establishing the realm of Gondor. As you may see, from the line of these Kings comes the Kings of Gondor, and in the end comes Aragorn.

There are certainly some characters that would be well known to the audience: take Sauron, for instance; and Elrond could also be there (with his brother Elros). In the end, the whole story is about Aragorn’s ancestors, isn’t it? Remember the battle of the Last Alliance, the one in the “prologue” of The Fellowship of the Ring movie? Well, this new movie could end with the very same battle, making the link with the Trilogy.

The only problem is that there is not much canonical material available on this subject, but surely Peter Jackson can manage that, can’t he?

If you have some time to spare, read Helge’s explanation of the movie, or go straight to the two parts of the story itself. Enjoy!

What do you think? Would it be good? I would like to hear from you in the comments below.

19 Comments

Filed under Inside Middle-Earth, Númenor, Silmarillion, The Hobbit, The Lord Of The Rings, Tolkien

Tagged as Hobbit, Lord of the Rings, Peter Jackson, Silmarillion, Tolkien

by Quenya101 | 12/18/2012 · 11:06 PM

Where do your choices lead you, Bilbo?

“And Bilbo found a ring and he returned it to its owner, a vile creature called Gollum.”

Imagine that! I don’t know which kind of story we would have if Bilbo had done that and this is just an illustrative way to show the important role our own choices play in life.

If there is a power we all have at the same amount is: free will. Eru gave it to all (do you really REALLY believe in a predetermined life where fate won’t let you escape any final outcome? Oh NO!) and we should start thinking deeply what you’re doing with your choices. Are you choosing wisely your friends? Your career? Are you choosing good deeds or bad? Are you following a good path?

Why the hell am I talking about that here? A couple of weeks ago, I found a someone’s precious in an ATM. The person had lost its tablet and I couldn’t imagine how frustrated that person was (or would be when he realized it) about losing such a particular item.

And here comes the choice role I’m talking about. I checked some things in the tablet and realized the person spoke German! Contacted him by email, we met and I gave his precious back. I have already lost my wallet with my ID and all my papers in it a few years ago and a homeless guy who found it, called me up and returned me that. I was so so so thankful! Now it was my turn to be on the other side!

Today Zmago, the Slovenian guy who won’t need to buy another tablet and make all his business projects again, invited me up to a pub where we had a great fantastic time. I met his friends and business partners, Beitia (from Basque Country) and Marcos (from Brazil) and instantly I saw what an excellent choice I have done. The guy is awesome, many things in common and certainly I got a new friend where I wasn’t expecting to find one! I had just found a tablet but with it, a huge choice and I’m happy to have chosen wisely!

For all Hobbits out there…let’s behave ourselves and spread some goodness in this vast World of ours, huh? The road goes ever on and on and where it may lead, sometimes it’s totally up to you and you only!!! Choose wisely!

2 Comments

Filed under Countries, Hobbit, The Hobbit

Tagged as Basque Country, Bilbo Baggins, Brazil, Gollum, Hobbit

by Quenya101 | 12/15/2012 · 7:06 AM

The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey Review

My face (most of the times)

“My dear Frodo! I have a tale to tell you but words won’t make any justice to the grandiosity of what you need to see with your own eyes from this tale. I’m pretty glad you can see it in 3D and 48fps!”

Yesterday I watched it! I got my friends together (Jim, Ly & Rach) and we went on our own journey to Middle-Earth (actually it was AMC’s theaters in New Brunswick…but that’s ok…it’s cool to add some fantasy to our ordinary lives, huh?)

Hobbit pack

SPOILER WINTER IS COMING!

The movie is astonishing! It makes you BE there. When it started showing Erebor and all its magnificence, a tear rolled. Seriously. I cried twice in this movie, but not crying like “how sad and touching this scene is”, I was more like crying from astonishment. First of all, I rarely blinked. Second of all, I got goose bumps all the time! No big surprise! Can you imagine my reaction when Radagast spoke Quenya and I heard perfectly among his muffled “grumbles” the words “quettar” and “óma” Owwwww, I burst with joy! What a wonderful job Peter Jackson has accomplished!

HIGHLIGHTS

Party scene with the introduction of all dwarves, Bilbo’s attitude (Martin Freeman nailed it!), the very distinct personalities all the dwarves portray and how lovely they do it! As an elf myself, I never cared for such stunted creatures, reckless and prone to feats of anger and emotional outbursts, but the movie shows lovely dwarves which you really relate to. It’s like “I want that dwarf to be my friend and buddy!”

Radagast was my favorite one! He is such a unknown foggy character in the books and the movie shows him in full light. Also, his part in detecting the decay of Mirkwood was fantastic shown! A glimpse of giant spiders here and there, some Quenya words to save a little fellow from the woods. I loved it!

The Goblins cave is another highlight full of tension, action and THAT’s where I got my slight uncomfortable stomach “action”. I ate Japanese food before (rice, chicken and vegetables) and wasn’t too concerned about the “nausea effect” but I felt a ripple when they were running and fighting their way out against all those goblins.

Gollum and Bilbo meeting and having their riddle game? Fantastic scene! Huge highlight! Gollum is super freaky, funny and scary at the same time! Damn how good it was!

(And what about Smaug in the end!?!?!? hehehehe)

FAILS

Hard hard hard to find one. Probably there is, but I’m not that lame guy who watches movies just to complain about this and that instead of enjoying the whole entertainment brought to life on the big screen.

Perhaps parts that I enjoyed less (for my personal reasons) were: Galadriel portray…AGAIN! Azog appearance (a little bit) and definitely the shortness of the movie! It was TOO short! When I realized it was ending…

And now, let’s hear from Ondo:

At first, I would like to say my opinion about the book, that I have finished reading on Friday. I……didn’t like it. Bilbo is a huge pain in the ass and also a thief, Thorin is a fantastic character, but he becomes absurdly greedy, compared to Fëanor himself, which made him lose my respect. I did not enjoy the way the childish way the book was written (I know he wrote it for his children), but it’s maybe because I’m so used to the First Age stories spread in numerous book that I could not get used to it. Either way, the book isn’t bad, I just didn’t like it.

Now, the movie……DAMN! It was simply fantastic. The first scenes, the attack of Smaug and the kite dragon… I knew it would be good right there. This may be a heresy, but I thought the movie was better than the book (crucify me if you wish…).

I was expecting a few Elvish sentences, and I got sad I couldn’t fully understand them right away (and, of course, was frowned upon by my friends).

I enjoyed a lot to see some of the backgrounds of the characters and the construction of Thorin as a hero, unlike what happens in the book. Also…. Radagast was fantastic! And I imagine his rabbit sled made me wonder of he is Santa Claus on the Southern Hemisphere… Because the poor reindeers would suffer in Brazilian summer in December. Jokes aside, the numerous Easter eggs (like Gandalf “you fools” line, or Bilbo’s ring scene) from the LOTR movies were fantastic, not to mention the books references, such as our friend Ungoliant being mentioned.

I’m not a fan of 3D movies (my head aches and the glasses bother me), and I had never seen a movie in IMAX before…. But this time I could enjoy it pretty well. Also, the 48fps thing made some scenes seem very realistic, which was fantastic.

Overall, the movie was beyond what I expected.

And here comes word from Erutulco:

Long things short: it was an awesome movie! I was expecting a great movie, and it didn’t let me down. All the contrary! I came out so excited, wishing I could go forward in time to watch the second part. I enjoyed it as much as a Tolkien fan could!

The good

Overall, the best was putting the story of The Hobbit in the huge context it has. By adding the extra parts, Peter Jackson made the story have a part in a greater history: Middle-earth’s history. It was a brave move for him to introduce some stories told in the Appendices of LOTR, and it was (generally) well done.

The landscapes were awesome! The Shire and Rivendell were as good as always, but the jewel was Erebor! It was so stunning! It really resembled a rich dwarf household.

I was delighted to see that the introduced more sentences in Sindarin and Quenya! Of the first I couldn’t understand one word. But I had to smile to myself when I understood some of the latter! It felt good…

The bad

Many things shocked me for differing so much from the book. But then I thought: “man, its a movie, not a book”. And its true, its BASED on the book, not a reproduction of it. Still, even though I went to the movie with a “don’t compare to the book” attitude, I couldn’t help being slightly disappointed in some parts. Especially in crucial parts as the finding of the Ring and the riddles (I mean, what was the need of changing that?). Don’t get me wrong, this things didn’t spoil the movie: they just left a small bitter taste in me.

The other bad thing (in my opinion) is that many characters lacked some of the “solemnity” they should bare, and some had excess of it (Galadriel’s case). In attempting to make it funny, they made them a bit ridiculous. I would’ve treated Radagast with some more dignity…

Finally, the voices… The dwarves’ and the goblin boss’ voices were too “english” to me. Not like the ones I would expect from those races. But this is a minor issue.